


Introduction to Musical Accompaniment

by Ifwecansparkle



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Autistic Character, Canon Autistic Character, Drabbles, Gen, Spoilers for all seasons, Vignettes, Written as gen but can be read as trobed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 06:18:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 1,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10758471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ifwecansparkle/pseuds/Ifwecansparkle
Summary: "It takes a while before anyone understands, just like most things where Abed is concerned."Written as part of the Autistic Fanwork Exchange on Tumblr. A series of ten vignettes about Abed Nadir, inspired by ten songs.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage" by Panic! At the Disco

_"I believe this may call for a proper introduction and, well, don't you see: I'm the narrator and this is just the prologue."_

It takes a while before anyone understands, just like most things where Abed is concerned. Britta, he thinks, is the first one to get it, because she's the one who rented the camera for him all those years ago. She recognizes a pattern in the way he likes to look through a lens, or filter information through an invented narrative: just one more level of abstraction from real life (there's a Blair Witch reference in there somewhere). 

She understands, and the next time Jeff starts to say that "you're not supposed to narrate real life, Abed. Didn't we talk about this?" in a voice laced with with carefully cultivated patience, she lifts one hand and stops him with a look. Jeff sits back and crosses his arms and looks like he wants to say that she Britta'd him in his tracks. 

That's the magic of her, that every once in a while she Brittas things in just the right way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Artificial Heart" by Jonathan Coulton

_"We're happy again, I nod and pretend to think it through. I don't have to think at all if I don't care for you."_

Sometimes he forgets that he is a clone. Usually it happens when he wakes up in the morning and expects to hear Troy's soft snores and incoherent mumbles, and is instead greeted with silence. And then he searches his memory banks and recalls everything he needs to know. 

He isn't sad. That's one perk, and he's thankful that Troy's cloning machine was faulty enough to leave him devoid of Real Abed's emotional attachments. The absence would be all the harder if he could feel it. Which he doesn't, of course. 

But he really, really wishes the homing pigeon DNA worked better.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Make a Move" by Icon for Hire

_"And if I had the answers I'd have written them out so I could tell you what to do and what this thing is about. But all I've ever learned comes secondhand and I dare not preach what I don't understand."_

Shirley keeps clearing her throat and bobbing her head, and he knows that means something. It's all quiet in the study room except for the incessant ticking of the analogue clock that he can sometimes read.

He wonders if she still assumes he can read thoughts or futures. On the off-chance that she does, he says, "Shirley, I'm not psychic, remember."

As usual, her laugh is high and light and doesn't really sound like a laugh at all to him. 

"No, Abed," she says, all sugary sweet but careful. 

"Then what did you--"

"Ben hasn't said his first words yet," she blurts out before he can finish. 

He raises his eyebrows at her. "Oh," he says blankly. 

She looks down at her hands. It's not too often that Shirley looks ashamed, but she does now. 

"I just thought," she begins and doesn't finish. "When did you...?"

"I don't remember."

He doesn't really know if he remembers or not. But he doesn't have answers for her, and answers are what she is looking for. He cocks his head and stares at her for a long moment. When she doesn't say anything else he assumes the conversation is over and he leaves.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "What You Own" from RENT

_"Don't breathe too deep. Don't think all day. Dive into work. Drive the other way. That drip of hurt, that pint of shame, goes away just play the game."_

Jeff sold that commercial as a portfolio building opportunity, but the file is still sitting in a folder on his laptop and he has no intentions of taking it any further. 

It's not as though he wants to make commercials for questionably authentic law firms the rest of his life. 

But Annie keeps describing his films as "Dadaist" and from the way she says it he isn't sure if it's a compliment. At least his first film starring Jeff (in the role of his father) meant something to someone. At least it meant something to HIM. 

Eventually he'll delete that commercial.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Oh No!" By Marina and the Diamonds

_"I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine. I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy."_

He wonders if Troy knows that Constable Reggie left shortly after he did. 

They happened so close together sometimes Abed forgets which one was real and which one wasn't. 

There would be a new Constable. There always was. He wasn't the first and he certainly wouldn't be the last. 

But just for one minute, when Reggie said his goodbyes to the Inspector, Abed forgot he was a clone, and he felt the pain of those combined losses. 

After that, Inspector Spacetime just isn't quite the same.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Stressed Out" by Twenty One Pilots

_"It would remind us of when nothing really mattered. Out of student loans and treehouse homes we all would take the latter."_

Summer is filled with picnic lunches in the treehouse, which is in the tallest tree in the forest. 

(It's guarded by Kickpuncher, and also by a tiger.)

It's always Troy and Abed and sometimes it's Troy and Abed and Annie, talking about school or television shows or occasionally air conditioners. 

(Of course the treehouse is air conditioned. Troy can air condition anything.)

The days are long. The sun never seems to go down.

(And even if it did, it wouldn't. Not here.)

No one ever seems to hear the whir and click of the Dreamatorium's engines at work.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Life On Mars?" by David Bowie

_"But the film is a saddening bore 'cause I wrote it ten times or more. It's about to be writ again."_

He knows where there story begins. They've all retraced their steps and discovered that Greendale found them in their lowest moments. There's something poetic about it, almost. 

Sometimes he tries to trace things through until the end. He likes movies to tie up neatly and he likes when he can predict their endings. 

But no matter what path he takes, like dragging his finger through a maze, he never comes up with an ending that seems right. They are all derivative or contrived or simply bad. 

It takes him a long time to before he reaches the conclusion that maybe some stories aren't meant to end. 

And for the first time in a long time he enjoys the show.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Wired Wrong" by Steam Powered Giraffe

_"Someday I might tire having walked through these fires because I am wired wrong. Maybe someday I'll be in a place where I can see that I'm not wired wrong."_

He likes Kickpuncher. What's not to like? His punches have the power of kicks, and judging by the staying power of the franchise, it's logical to assume that he can't be killed. 

What he can do is malfunction, and sometimes Abed thinks he likes that best of all. 

The first time Abed used the word "malfunctioning" to describe himself it was because it was the first word he had been able to reach out and grasp for hours. Annie clapped her hands in delight of understanding, and after that they spent hours carefully constructing a new lexicon of similarly useful words: malfunctioning. Short circuiting. Wired wrong. 

Annie protests the last one, but he insists on keeping it, at least at first. 

Eventually he learns that the word he is searching for is "different," not "wrong."

Eventually he learns that the two words are not synonymous.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Dear Avery" by The Decemberists

_"There are times life will rattle your bones and will bend your limbs, but you're still far and away the boy you've ever been. So you bend back and shake at the frame, oh the frame you made. But don't you shake alone. Please Avery, come home."_

Sometimes Abed shows up at Jeff's apartment at 3 AM. It's a miracle that he still opens the door and ushers him in.

Sometimes they talk. Other times Jeff just shoves some sort of terrifying green fitness smoothie into his hands because it's the closest thing he has to a comforting beverage like tea. Abed sips politely even though the texture is grainy. 

Usually he ends up falling asleep on the couch, and wakes up awkwardly tucked under decorative throw pillows and blankets that are a foot too short, and Jeff always denies responsibility, even though they are alone in the apartment. 

(He stopped coming once, when he started feeling like a burden. But that was worse, and they both knew it. So the disjointed tradition resumed.)

Sometimes he wonders why Jeff still opens the door, all bleary-eyed and sleepy, when he knows it will always be him. 

Other times he could swear he's been waiting up for him.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I'm Your Moon" by Jonathan Coulton

_"I'm your moon, you're my moon. We go round and round. From out here, it's the rest of the world that looks so small."_

The study room feels mostly safe, even on days when nothing else feels mostly safe.   
It's the center of their orbit. 

Troy has passed astronomy, and he says Abed is Pluto. Abed thinks he's talking about the dog at first. 

But then he realizes what he means and why he means it, and he accepts. 

And the orbit continues, like all the important things (space and Greendale and Kickpuncher) continue. 

And that is enough.


End file.
